Our team includes pseudoscientists from across the World, each with the only the best and most expensive doctorates that can be purchased from the American College of Holistic Nutrition. They wear the white coat of scientific authority and therefore no one should be sceptical of their claims or contradict them.
We are on a crusade against toxins, free-radicals and the pollutants of modern life.
You can see how they have damaged this protein string from a sample sent to us for hair analysis:
The dark areas show clear evidence of cathartic thinning – stress is literally reducing the healthy compounds in our hair.